Diagnosed with I.E.D.

I was watching CNN the other day as they showcased more of America’s stupidity, when I came across a news clip airing an incident where a man involved in a road rage incident slashed another man with a box knife in Florida. Apparently, the assailant’s lawyers are trying to get him off the hook with the argument that this wasn’t an typical act of road rage. Rather, they claim that the man suffers from a mental condition where there is a problem of sudden, out-of-proportion reactions to everyday hassles, also known as "intermittent explosive disorder".

What the heck? Now every time someone looses their temper and does something extremely stupid, it can be blamed on a biological imbalance? "I'm terribly sorry, your Honor. My chemically-imbalanced body made me do it. I couldn't stop my organs and members from performing that heinous act."

Upon second thought, this might not be a bad idea. I believe I may have been affected by a bit of “intermittent explosive disorder” last week when I was sitting in police-regulated traffic. Ok, and I admit to a bit of “intermittent explosive disorder” when the construction work at 4th Circle ruined the local water pressure, causing me to not be able to fill my tanks last week. And let’s not even mention the fact that the electric company is double-charging me for a bill I already paid. But hey, there’s nothing I can do about it. I have a biological explanation every time my fuse runs short.